Banging My Head Against The Wall

I'm miffed.  My mother, bless her heart, tries to be helpful by sending me information about jobs she thinks I should apply for but, more often than not, it just fuels my general state of aggravation.  She's suggested some pretty ridiculous shit, such as getting my CNA so I can wipe 90 year old ass for $9 an hour or applying for a position overseeing youth programs because I went to summer camp as a child or enrolling in a six month medical transcription program as if that would somehow guarantee a job or applying for a job in which I'd be required to live on the grounds year-round(can I bring my boyfriend and two dogs, and, oh yeah, what about my house?), but the suggestion I received today takes the fucking cake.  As fate would have it (and I know this is how fate would have it because fate likes to piss in my face), an assistant position in the HR area was just posted at the agency from which my employment was recently terminated.  She's suggesting I apply for this position.  Not only that, but also that I should use an employee from the office I used to work in as a reference, as if that bitch would do me any favors.  Further, one of the job duties of the position involves recording board minutes and assembling board packets for the very board on which the very person who dismissed me from employment serves!  To make matters worse, I graduated from the same master's program as the HR Director, which I could tell she didn't like when I interviewed with her for the job in which I was hired for and fired from in a matter of 90 days.  What a shame.  This would be a good opportunity if only I'd never been hired there in the first place.  The cherry on top is that this is the second HR position I haven't been able to apply for in the last week on account of this whole fiasco.  There is an opening for a Human Resources Assistant at the very organization where the wife of the dick head who fired me is a manager.  From the land of no opportunity, the Labor Statistic is signing off for today because she has to go find a big ass towel to wipe all the piss off her face.